The first time someone told me that acceptance is the answer to all of my problems, I thought they had dove off of the deep end.  I had never heard of anything so preposterous.  “Isn’t that a nice little pat answer that doesn’t say anything,” I thought?  I was going through a divorce, trying to stay sober and trying to stay in school going through all of the grant, loan and scholarship red tape.  Something as simple as the toilet clogging made me want to drink.  All I need to do is accept it all and it will go away?  How’s that going to unclog my toilet?

I started complaining to my sponsor about my ex and she told me everything is the way it’s supposed to be.  “Why?  How do you know,” I retorted?  She said, “Because that’s the way it is.”  For some reason that spoke to me.  Everything else was the way it is supposed to be.  It’s me that needed to change.

If the toilet clogged, instead of panicking I could calmly unplug it.  I could accept my ex for who he is and maybe I’d stay a little more serine.  “Unless I accept life on life’s terms,”I will never be happy with my situation, my ex or myself.

This was extremely difficult at first and then I had an epiphany.  What if someone wanted me to be something different than I am?  Wouldn’t that be painful?  Maybe I should allow others to be who they are.  I learned how to focus on all that is good about whoever I was irritated with or unhappy with.  This did not happen overnight.  It was a process of several years and the same issue still crops up once in a while.

“When I find some person, place or situation—unacceptable to me—I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment.”

I have had a lot of changes at work in the last year.  I have spent the majority of the year, fighting, complaining and whining about my situation and irritated when transitions aren’t smooth and people don’t follow through.  I don’t think it ever occurred to me to that accepting it would be the easier softer way and that maybe everything is the way it’s supposed to be.  Now a year later I’m tired and sick and still struggling with the same issue, life on life’s terms.  I’m surprised I still have friends and family that listen to me.

Just for today I will think about and focus on all the good in my current situation knowing that my higher power doesn’t make mistakes and that everything is as it’s supposed to be